Joe's Midnight Movie Reviews: Toxic Mutant Halloween Edition

Halloween guest misread by Joe from PIZZA PENTAGRAM! Point Break counts because of masks.

Child's Play (1988)

Joe's midnight movie review!!!

So the other night I watched Child's play (1988)!! Still on a 80s kick. This slasher flick I think is underrated. I think everything is underrated tho unless it sucks tho. Takes place in Chicago, murderer on the run shot and dying uses black magic to put his soul in a doll (Chucky)… The mom from 7th heaven buys the doll and gives it to her son. The doll starts to kill people and no one believes the kid. Gotta listen to the truth. Anyway eventually people realize the doll is fucking alive and killing people! Gotta stop Chucky. Creepy AF. Um I don't remember the end to be honest but what I saw and remember, pretty good movie.… I give it three pizza knife emojis.

🍕🔪🍕🔪🍕🔪

Field of Dreams (1989)

Joe's Midnight Movie Review!

Ok so I had no choice to watch this movie, I was trapped, so I'm doin a movie review. I had to watch…

FIELD OF DREAMS. 😑😑😑

Ugh.

Some guy lives on a farm with his fam. He starts to hear voices telling him to build a baseball field.… So he does. Then a Ray Liotta poltergeist shows up. And even more dead poltergeist baseball players show up to play baseball.… The ghost baseball players are a cool idea. But then Kevin Costner has to find Darth Vader and some other poltergeists.

And the plot gets stupid.

And that pretty much the entire movie in a nut shell.

Jeez this movie sucked!

I'm sorry, Kevin Costner has to be one of the most boring actors in the world!… I mean, if ya took a Labrador Retriever and replaced water world with it you'd prob have a better movie. Just a Lab. A DOG!!!!

The only great part of this movie is when Darth Vader says he's going to beat Kevin Costner with a crowbar.

I give this movie a ghost of a pizza.

👻

Point Break (1991)

Joe's Midnight Movie Review!

The Toxic mutant movie reviews continue.

I think this might be my first 90s movie and it's a big one too, you know it…

POINT BREAK (1991)

Directed, well, by someone.…

Has a all-start cast Neo (Keanu Reeves), Patrick Swayze (Dirty Dancing), Gary Busey (😐), and a Red hot chillie pepper...

Neo joins the FBI to eat donuts and be a bank robbery detective in 90s 80s California. LA?

Teaming up with veteran FBI agent to take down a mysterious gang of bank robbers called the "Ex presidents".

Garry Busey was taking shrapnel in the ass when you were cramping in ya hand and rubbing it in ya face!!

Neo has to learn to surf to become one with the waves, and find bank robbing surfers.

Neo finds a girl friend and a group of fun loving surfer friends but soon finds out his buddies are none other then The Ex presidents.

Around this time of the movie Neo says the name of the movie in the movie. So that's where the title comes from.

Red hot chillie pepper shoots him self in the foot. In a police raid.

Neo tries to chase down Swayze who is Ronald Reagan Ex President. Swayze starts a fire! Swayze runs through a house with people eating dinner! Swayze throws a pit bull at Neo! Neo falls and injures his knee and whales like Keanu reeves would sound if he has to act in pain. Keanu points his gun at Ragean that he knows is Swayze. They stare down but Neo can't bring him self to shooting his friend and fires his gun in the air, emptying the clip. Cinema, history.

The ex presidents are holding Neo's girl friend hostage.

Keanu and Busey's teeth track down the ex presidents

It's a nasty shoot out.

Keanu jumps out of a plane with out a parachute.

Shoot outs just continue.

Neo gets the girl.

This movie just keeps on going and Neo tracks down Swayze.

Swayze surfs to his death.

This action crime thriller with surfing is one of the best movies. Everyone should watch this movie again and again. I give it four pizza surfers.

🍕🏄🏻🍕🏄🏻🍕🏄🏻🍕🏄🏻

Joe is a retired aspiring professional wrestler, writes movie reviews at midnight. Cult clothing maker of PIZZA PENTAGRAM. Follow him on Twitter @PIZZADIEYOUNG and at pizzapentagram.com. Many parts of this bio may be false.

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